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“Boy, were we wrong!”

Evolution News & Views April 1, 2011

“Boy, were we wrong!” So says a highly placed spokesman inside the Discovery Institute who prefers to remain anonymous.

“We now know beyond a shadow of a doubt,” says the spokesman, “that Darwinian evolution is a fact. There is overwhelming evidence that all living things are descended from a common ancestor by accidental mutations and unguided natural selection. Intelligent design is wrong, wrong, wrong!”

The anonymous spokesman says that this remarkable turn of events is due to recent scientific breakthroughs in paleontology, embryology, experimental selection, evolutionary developmental biology (evo-devo), and molecular phylogeny.

First, paleontology: Berkeley dino-bird expert Kevin Padian has just purchased the last missing link from a Chinese fossil dealer–thereby providing us with an unbroken record of ancestors and descendants from the Big Bang to the present.

Second, embryology: University of Chicago fruit fly geneticist Jerry Coyne and his colleague, historian Robert Richards, have declared a Scientific Consensus that vertebrate embryos really are most similar in their earliest stages–thereby proving once and for all that human embryos are just fish.

Third, experimental selection: Distinguished bacteriologist Richard Lenski of Michigan State University has observed after more than fifty thousand rounds of artificial selection that E. coli are still E. coli–thereby convincing himself and Even-More-Distinguished philosopher Robert Pennock that natural selection has the unlimited power to create new species, organs and body plans…

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“Boy, were we wrong!” – Evolution News & Views

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