Sarah Ankenman: Why I am a Christian

by Sarah Ankenman

“And above all, you must be asking which door is the true one; not which pleases you best…” – C.S. Lewis

You know, I have a really hard time understanding intellectual, non-Christians… I mean, how can you have such good evidence for things like God’s existence or Jesus’ resurrection and still deny it? Why is it so hard for people to trust God with their lives? Today, I put it together.

So, there are good days and bad days in the life following divorce, even years afterwards. When the bad days come, it is hard to stay focused on the Lord because sometimes you can’t understand why God allows things to happen to you and you can get angry at Him. I have been struggling to remain content in my singleness the last couple days and so of course, today a girlfriend comes to me today and is like, “I need advice on how to remain content in my singleness and have patience for God’s perfect will.” I was in the middle of something, so I stopped, and without any preparation, turned to her and gave her the perfect textbook, Biblical, Christian-ese answer ever. And we prayed, and she left the conversation encouraged. And then I just sat there for a minute and was like, how in the heck can I know exactly what to say to someone else in my mind, but it is so hard to take to heart myself? Why do I struggle with stuff when I know sooooo well what the true answer is? And then I realized that is how people can recognize the truth and still refuse to take it to heart. Because it’s hard to live in the pursuit of truth.

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It’s a daily choice to decide to let God direct your life, and some days, you just really don’t want to. You want to press on the accelerator because it seems like God is driving like grandma in the slow lane and you are anxious to get to your destination. Or sometimes you get hungry and want to veer off on an exit to find the nearest place you can satiate your hunger. Or you think you can get there faster on side streets so you take the journey in your own hands and hop off the freeway-which is the most direct path- (but it actually ends up taking you twice as long because of all the stop signs and lights – I know you know what I am talking about…). Non-Christians just don’t value truth enough to live their lives accordingly. Their spirit recognizes Jesus as God, but it comes with a condition of moral living and their flesh wars against that. So they look for alternative paths. To avoid the high morality that the Bible calls for. To avoid the hard decisions.

As Jim Wallace says, “I’m not a Christian because it ‘works’ for me. I had a life prior to Christianity that seemed to be working just fine…

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