How Do I Share What I Believe? The Relationship Between Low Expectations and Lackluster Evangelism
by J Warner Wallace
I have a good friend (I’ll call him Bob) who I’ve known for over fifteen years. We’ve worked with one another, we’ve eaten many meals together, and our families are friendly. I’ve shared my faith with Bob and he’s fully aware of what I believe about God and about Jesus. He’s an uninterested atheist, however, and as I’ve watched our relationship develop, I’ve come to realize Bob’s disinterest is having an impact on the way I behave as a Christian. The more disinterested he becomes, and the more ineffective I feel, the lower my expectations are for his ever coming to faith in Jesus. In the beginning, I had hope and high expectations. After years of rejection and disinterest, my expectations are now rather low. I often find myself thinking, “Bob’s never going to become a Christian.” I know how terrible that may sound, but I bet you’ve experienced something similar with some of your friends. There are times when our failed efforts cause us to have low expectations, and if we’re not careful, our low expectations can turn into lackluster evangelism:
When Our Expectations Are Low, We’re Less Likely to Talk About God
As my expectations began to drop, I found myself saying less and less about Jesus. In the early years of my friendship with Bob, I was very open about my beliefs. I even bought Bob a Bible at a point when I thought he might be receptive. He never opened it and eventually said he misplaced it.
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As the years passed, Bob responded to my statements and efforts by teasing me or simply telling me he wasn’t interested. I eventually stopped talking about Jesus when we were together. My low expectations for Bob exposed my fallen, lazy nature. As a result, I talked less about what I believe.
When Our Expectations Are Low, We’re Less Likely to Model Christ
But something more insidious began to happen as Bob continued to reject any effort I made to share the truth about God. I found my character was often compromised. Police officers are often uniquely cynical, discouraged and sarcastic, given the broad variety of evil we deal with on a daily basis. It’s always a struggle to maintain Christ-like character in this line of work, but I started to notice I was far more likely to behave like the old Jim when I was with Bob (rather than when I was with other non-believers). Why? I’ve tried to examine my heart as honestly as possible, and I think my low expectations were part of the problem. Because I no longer expected Bob to become a Christian, I stopped modeling Christ for him. I was far more likely to slip into his level of sarcasm and cynicism than elevate him with my example of Christ’s character. I know how bad that sounds, but I’m trying to be honest. My low expectations for Bob exposed my fallen, sarcastic nature. As a result, I was less likely to be the man I’m supposed to be…
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